THE Hawaiian Breakfast Burrito

In August of last year, I wrote about THE Breakfast Burrito. Well, since then, I have created another delectable breakfast delight: THE Hawaiian Breakfast Burrito. Here it is…

The Cast: American cheese (‘cause it’s American), BBQ Sauce (Sweet Baby Ray’s: Hawaiian), Cayenne pepper (still muy caliente), Eggs (scrambled), Mustard (mmm…), Pineapple (sweet and yummy), SPAM (because it’s SPAM), Tortillas (the wrap).

Alright. So, this little gem of an idea was concocted due to boredom. Seriously. Boredom. While I am not typically adventurous with my food choices, I can be—from time to time. And one day—while looking about in my ‘fridge—I came across a bottle of Sweet Baby Ray’s barbecue sauce, the Hawaiian kind. It’s good stuff.

That sauce got me to thinking: What other breakfast foods say “Hawaiian”? (hey, I like breakfast, okay. it’s super yummy and I could eat breakfast all day. so anyway…) Pineapple. Yeah, Pineapple. SPAM! Yes. SPAM. SPAM says “Hawaii” for sure. And both are good anytime—unless you’ve eaten a lot of SPAM in the short period of time, then no, you should stop and go to the doctor.

There is something about SPAM that screams Hawaii. So, it had to be included. For an more in-depth look at the subtleties of what is SPAM, visit Food Review from Quarantine — SPAM, by R. L. Morgan.
The magical trio.

So, this variation of THE Breakfast Burrito just adds a little more prepwork and more stuff to wrap up into the tortilla. Now, if you are worried about volume of foodstuffs, maybe consider a larger tortilla (I still used a regular tortilla).

The Hawaiian Breakfast Burrito is simple. It’s also probably not the healthiest. However, it is fuel. It is very filling. And it is oh-so-yummy!

Here’s what you need:
2 eggs (preferably medium to large)
2 slices of American cheese (substitutions will be discussed later—it’s later: they’re wrong. substitutions are wrong)
2 flour tortillas
Cayenne pepper
BBQ Sauce (Sweet Baby Ray’s: Hawaiian)
SPAM (that weird meat-like stuff in a can)
Pineapple (tidbits are easy to set and measure, but you can substitute crushed pineapple if you like—chunks are too large)

Now, just like any other recipe, yes, you can substitute changes, but just like any other recipe, if you make substitutions you don’t get the same result. And, just like the recipe for THE Breakfast Burrito, this one is simple.

First, get two pans, one big enough to cook a couple slices of SPAM, and another large enough to scramble two eggs. Then, set your stove burners to medium.

After slicing the SPAM (I like mine thin-ish), put two slices into one pan and begin to cook. If you start cooking the SPAM first, when it’s time to flip the almost-meat, other ingredients can be cooking, and then all the pieces will come together while warm.

Next, place the butter in the pan and put the pan on the burner. I use this to gauge the pan’s warmth for cooking. How much butter? Well, about two pats worth.

While the butter’s melting, and the SPAM is cooking, do the preparation work. Set out two tortillas. Take one of the slices of American cheese, tear it in half (if you have to cut the cheese, you got issues). Place one half off to the side of each tortilla. You will place the cooked SPAM in the center of the tortilla, and then the cheese atop the SPAM.

Once the butter is melty, spread it around the pan. We don’t want any sticky areas. The butter helps make for nice and even cooking.

Now add the other stuff! Take the other slice of American cheese and place in pan. Add cayenne pepper to slightly stronger than preferred taste. (I’m not a spicy/pepper fan of any kind, but ooo-yum here) About four good dashes usually does it. Then, a good-sized dollop of the mustard.

Also, this is the time to flip the SPAM. The first side takes a little bit of time to cook as the pan heats up. The second side doesn’t take long at all.

Then add the eggs to the cheese/pepper/mustard mix.

While the eggs are beginning to cook, you can slide the SPAM onto the tortillas, place the half-slices of American cheese on top, then add the pineapple tidbits (about eight per slice of SPAM). Or, add your own desired amount if using crushed pineapple—just be cautious of excess juices from the can, they can make the tortilla soggy.

Now just scramble the eggs and cook to desired consistency. I prefer ‘wetter’ eggs. My wife likes ‘drier’ eggs. This part is up to you, it really does not affect the outcome as the flavors are already together.

Once done, divide the scrambled eggs into two equal portions and set on each tortilla (preferably, on top of the SPAM, cheese, and pineapple). Then, garnish with some Hawaiian BBQ sauce (as much as you like—I find a single pass is just right).

Next, wrap up your tortillas. The section where the cheese and SPAM were, should end up on top. And while the warm eggs heat and melt the half slices of cheese inside the wrap, the pineapples stay slightly cool—creating a delightful flavor interaction. And now you can take a moment to clean up your mess (which isn’t much).

Finally: Eat! And, because they’re portable, they can be taken on the go. I like to have mine with a tall glass of pineapple juice (instead of my typical orange juice—which is also good with these).

And there you have it, THE Hawaiian Breakfast Burrito! Enjoy!

Note: Due to the ‘wetness’ of my eggs, the butter, the true nature of American cheese, the pineapple (depending on how juicy it is), and the barbecue sauce, THE Hawaiian Breakfast Burrito may drip a little. So, have a napkin handy. But if you wrapped the tortilla right, it still won’t matter. Just don’t say I didn’t warn you.

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